Well, you can stop wondering, because you've now got the lowdown on Words of Affirmation right here. ESPECIALLY in the context of a marriage relationship (which is what we are addressing today). One five star reviewer said the book made “life changing good sense”. No amount of affection or reassurance from an outside party can replace your own. saying “missing you - can’t wait till you get home”. I feel sure your consistency will pay off. Forced me to look closely at how I can treat my spouse in a more loving and understanding way. People who have words of affirmation as their primary love language have a nose for B.S. If your love language is Words of Affirmation or Affection, once your partner understands that, then it may not be too hard for them to give it to you. "Words of Affirmation is typically the language of someone who gets off knowing that their partner is paying attention to them...and appreciates what makes them special." I really appreciate how I can always rely on you to... You’re a great mother/father/stepmom, etc. And if compliments make you melt, your love language is probably Words of Affirmation. Ebonny (author) from UK on February 01, 2016: Ebonny (author) from UK on August 10, 2015: My feeling is that words of affirmation in a text, e-mail, note, letter or whatever can be just as powerful as the spoken word on the telephone or face to face. Post encouraging messages on your child's bathroom or bedroom wall or mirror. can be even more poignant as when we write things down we have more time to consider our words carefully and find just the right way to best express our deep feelings of admiration, praise, encouragement or whatever. You notice your partner's new haircut immediately and remember to ask your coworker about his daughter's birthday party. Because your partner won't know that trying to cuddle you after an argument versus giving you a thoughtful and sincere apology, for example, will be lost on you, which can create a disconnect. I couldn't have chosen a better woman/wife/mother, man/husband/father. Some felt the book could be thought of as a "training ground" to rekindle romance and bring about a significantly happier and more fulfilling marriage/relationship. The author of The 5 Love Languages advocates affirming the good qualities a spouse possesses to third parties, which could well make a spouse positively beam when the news gets back to them. So be sure you... Be Empathetic. It … As well as a list of examples, there is also advice for those who cannot readily think of anything great to say about their partner! If your fans use words of affirmation as their love language, they’re MUCH more likely to keep clicking and buying a feed subscription. Normani Is More Confident Than Ever Before, Filters, FaceTune, And Your Mental Health, ‘Fitness Helped Me Find Joy After Losing My Leg’, The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts, When To Say 'I Love You' For The First Time. If you’re not familiar with the book, the idea is that all of us speak a love language. If this isn't your strong suit, try standing in front of a mirror and telling yourself, "I'm enough." The fans who send you messages wanting to chat? Even a “Go get 'em!” on a sticky note tacked to the bathroom mirror is enough to turn your dreary morning into one that’s a little more bearable. It doesn't mean you fish for compliments. One of the 5 love languages is "Words of Affirmation", which focuses on love expression through compliments, encouragements, and appreciations. In short, if Words of Affirmation is your love language, it means what your partner has to say about you and to you speaks volumes. If his love language is words of affirmation, what he is really needing from you, is to hear WHY you love him. let your significant other know that you are thinking of them), an email (e.g. Thank You. As the theory goes, every person has two main love languages, or how they show and receive love from their partner. Therefore adapt, omit, and add to the examples on this page as required and develop the habit of offering words of affirmation every day—whatever the initial response. 2.8k. Talk Dirty During Sex. My boyfriend is a trucker and is gone for 90% of the month so we rely on texting, and social media to communicate until he is home. They want you to help with chores around the house, to make them special meals, to do their ironing when you do yours, to wash their car when they are too busy or to organise a birthday celebration. Some have said they now regularly give the book as a wedding gift to family and friends, such is their belief in its principles. No doubt, hearing someone else tell you how special you are feels nice and all, but it should always come as backup to believing in your worth. Reviewers say that the book can certainly help those in committed relationships and marriage and some also observed it could give a heads up to people who are currently single so that they are armed with the tools to make their next relationship more fulfilling. These ideas should be genuine and from the heart. What Exactly Are The Five Love Languages? Phone calls don't happen very often when he has to focus on driving. This is how we both express love and how we receive love. Ah, glad you asked. The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate is a 1992 book by Gary Chapman. You're the one I love—just can't help myself! For example, "Thank you for getting me my favourite _____ every week—that's so thoughtful." Of course, this doesn’t mean that you/your partner don’t express and appreciate the other languages, such as acts of service, physical touch, quality time, and receiving/giving gifts. Harry Styles And Olivia Wilde Are Dating!! It's about how to relate and convey love to a partner in the way that they can most feel and accept. Make a point of noticing the good things in life generally everyday and share these thoughts with your significant other. For example, "You look great in that suit—I love how the colour brings out your skin tone, eye colour," or "You're such a patient and caring parent—I especially like how you ... " give a specific example(s). Words of affirmation keep me alive, and in turn I give them readily. Feel most appreciated at a nice dinner? Each one is important and expresses love in its own way. Hence do challenge yourself to give at least two genuine heartfelt compliments, words of appreciation, and/or encouragement daily. Women's Health may earn commission from the links on this page, but we only feature products we believe in. Of course, you can directly compliment your spouse when others are present too. This content is imported from {embed-name}. Why Are Words of Affirmation Important? Ebonny (author) from UK on August 05, 2013: So Words of Affirmation is certainly a primary language for you and if those around you know and practise this you must be a very happy bunny! To some, words may not seem that meaningful, but to people whose love language is words of affirmation, underneath each word is an ocean of meaning and significance that is working to either strengthen or weaken the relationship's bonds. When physically speaking to him isn't always doable, are text messages at least once a day with words of affirmation in them as powerful and meaningful as verbally speaking them? Learn how to speak the Words of Affirmation love language, even if it’s not your love language. … That's not to say a throwaway "Love you!" Even though I am a trained public speaker, I am often times not very good with how to respond to my wife's need for words of affirmation. David and Victoria Beckham definitely speak each other's love languages—peep the proof in their ~body~ language: A big Words of Affirmation no-no is relying on your partner to make you feel good about yourself. It's very important to avoid negativity which might discourage further affirmations. Words of Affirmation is one of five Love Languages that author Gary Chapman identified, the other four being Gifts, Acts of Service, Quality Time and Touch. I don’t know why it took me reading a book other than the Bible to realize how real the power behind our words really is. In short, if you thrive on the thoughtfulness behind a present, Receiving Gifts is yours. His book, The 5 Love Languages, is a highly rated best seller, and after reading a selection of reviews from those who had read the book, I purchased an unabridged copy of the audio version to listen to with my partner. Keep enjoying one another. When complimenting, add specific details that will let a spouse know that they are genuinely appreciated. … Also, some people find it embarrassing to give or receive a compliment face to face and having it done via the written word can take away some of that uneasiness for the giver or receiver. Perhaps you missed the 5 Love Languages theory, created by pastor, relationship counselor, and author Gary Chapman, PhD. You like when others say they care about you or appreciate having you in their lives In the end, the Words of Affirmation love language is exactly that: affirming another person by using our words. “ life changing good sense ” are five love languages comes to Relationships, feeling understood and, course... 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